Thriving at Work After Having a Baby with Kate Rainford
Nadia, our co-founder, recently spoke to Kate Rainford on Instagram Live as part of our
Maternal Wellness Month, which we’re hosting to celebrate mums in the lead-up to
Mother’s Day.
Kate is a brilliant executive coach who specialises in supporting mums as they return to
work after maternity leave. She’s also worked in leadership roles herself and understands
first-hand the emotional, mental and practical challenges of juggling a career and a young family.
The Reality of Returning to Work
Kate shared how becoming a mum changed her own outlook and how she wasn’t fully
prepared for the identity shift and mental load that followed maternity leave. She described it as “a puzzle that explodes and all the pieces have to be put back together in a certain way”, and went on to say that many mums face unexpected self-doubt and feel
disconnected from the version of themselves they knew before.
What Is Imposter Syndrome and Why Is It So Common?
Many women experience imposter syndrome when returning to work, a form of self-doubt that stems from feeling out of sync with your previous role. Kate explained the difference between confidence (which comes from doing) and self-belief (which is deeper and linked to mindset). These two often work together, and both can take a knock after time away from the workplace.
She reassured us that this feeling is completely normal and doesn’t last forever. Your
confidence will rebuild over time as you settle back into work.
Practical Ways to Rebuild Confidence
• Be kind to yourself – Accept that it’s normal to feel out of your depth in the early
days.
• Reconnect with your strengths – Remind yourself of everything you’ve achieved
in your career so far. That hasn’t gone away.
• Find peer support – Talk to someone who’s been through it too. Having a
colleague, friend or mentor to speak honestly with can make a big difference.
• Don’t take your emotional temperature too early – It’s okay if it feels hard at first. Let yourself adapt before making big decisions.
Asking for Flexibility
Kate emphasised how powerful it can be to advocate for flexible working – and how to
make the case for it in a way that works for both you and your employer. She encouraged
mums to:
• Clearly outline how flexible working can benefit your employer, not just yourself.
• Frame your proposal around productivity and long-term commitment.
• Plan ahead where possible (for nursery events or childcare pick-ups) so your team
knows what to expect.
The Presence Paradox
Kate introduced the idea of the ‘presence paradox’ – when you’re at work, you feel guilty
for not being at home, and when you’re at home, your mind is still on work.
She encouraged creating intentional moments of focus. For example, if you’re with your
children for an hour in the evening, try putting your phone away and fully engaging in that
time. Likewise, when you’re working, trust that your child is safe and cared for so you can
focus on your job without guilt.
How to Spot and Prevent Burnout
Burnout is a very real risk for parents balancing it all. Signs to watch for include:
• Irritability
• Feeling overwhelmed
• Loss of enjoyment in everyday life
• Exhaustion that doesn’t ease with rest
If you notice these signs, ask yourself what your ‘taps’ are – healthy outlets to release the
stress. That could be exercise, fresh air, talking to someone who understands, or seeking
coaching support. It’s also about letting go of perfectionism, asking for help, and reminding yourself that good is good enough.
Final Thoughts
Kate’s biggest piece of advice? Don’t measure how you’re feeling in the first few weeks or months. Everything feels heightened, but it won’t stay that way.
She also reminded us to give ourselves grace – not everything has to be perfect, and if a
few balls drop during the week, that’s totally normal.
We hope this conversation has helped you feel better about returning to work, requesting
flexible working, or simply trying to juggle work and childcare. You’re doing better than you think.
To learn more about Kate’s coaching, head to katerainford.com or find her on LinkedIn at
Kate Rainford.